Craigslist "funnies"

[kb_air]

Suzuki 1982 GS 1100s w/17000 org. miles 575-571-8383 - $3500 (Las Cruces NM 575-571-8383)

Date: 2012-02-02, 2:51PM MST
Reply to: mmgjg-2793592647@sale.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Suzuki Bobber 1982 GS 1100s , 5 spd. , It has a clean title and i have it in hand. it comes w/ a custom rear fender ,custom gas tank Peant 2.25 gal. , Custom 2004 wide glide front end , I rode this bike before i bought it and it Runs like a Bat Out of Hell! If you want a bike thats got balls and looks good, heres your chance. It needs to be wired to the hand controls and your good to go. I can deliver to El paso. Any questions call me at 575-571-8383. Marcus

• Location: Las Cruces NM 575-571-8383
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

whats with that fender? Lol!

[Dave8338]

OK, let me start off by saying this XL is only available for purchase by the manliest of men (or women). My friend, if it was possible for a dirt bike to sprout chest hair and a five o'clock shadow, this Honda would look like Tom Selleck. It is just that manly.

It was never intended to ride down a grass filled ditch in your LBZ baggy gear looking like a spode. It wasn't meant to do 3-foot long pop wheelies in front of your hillbilly friends in your cousin's back yard while everyone drinks Budweiser. No, that's what a 50 is for. If that's the kind of bike you're looking for, then just do us all a favor and stop reading right now. This bike has been to hell and back, twice, and has the scars to prove it. So if you can't handle being seen behind the bars of this biblical, fire breathing, dragon slaying hero because it has a few purple hearts, move on.

This bike was engineered by 3rd degree ninja pirate super-warriors in the highest mountains of Japan to serve the needs of the man that cheats death on a daily basis. They didn't even consider superfluous Nancy boy, contradictory decor in the form of Monster, Red Bull, Spy, Oakley, FMF, and Pro Circuit stickers plastered all over the bike. This bike looks legit because it is.

This brute comes with the things us testosterone-fueled super action junkies need. It has a 600cc to fly down the trail or to outrun the cops and has a 6-speed transmission so you know grandma won't be taking off with it when you're not looking. It's saved my bacon more than once. It's got special blood/gore resistant grippy seat cover. It even has a first-aid kit in the back. You know what the first aid kit has in it? A pint of whiskey, a stitch-your-own-wound kit and a hunk of leather to bite down on when you're operating on yourself. (NOTE: I cut myself fighting a streetbiker who looked at me funny and used the first aid kit, a replacement kit is available for an additional $100 and comes with Gentleman's Jack.)

My price on this bad boy is an incredibly low $1600 but I'll entertain reasonable offers. And by reasonable, I mean don't walk up and tell me you'll give me $500 for it. That's liable to earn you a Burmese-roundhouse-sphincter-kick with a follow up three fingered eye-jab. Would it hurt? Hell yeah. Let's just say you won't be the prettiest guy at the Coldplay concert anymore.

There's only 25,000 miles on this hellcat from Planet Kickass since purchased in 83'. Trust me, it will outlive you and the offspring that will carry your name. It will live on as a monument to your machismo.

Now, go look in the mirror and tell me what you see. If it's a rugged, no holds barred, super brute he-man macho Chuck Norris stunt double, then reply to this ad. I might be out hang-gliding or BASE jumping or just chilling with my lady, but leave a message and I'll get back to you. And when I do, we'll talk about a price over a nice glass of Schmidt while we listen to Johnny Cash.

[cowboyup3371]

Man Dave, I'd love to see a picture of that beaut

[robertbarr]

My friend, if it was possible for a dirt bike to sprout chest hair and a five o'clock shadow, this Honda would look like Tom Selleck. It is just that manly.

Pretty comical, and cleverly written. It sounds like an excerpt from Real Men Don't Eat Quiche.

[toejams1]

OK, let me start off by saying this XL is only available for purchase by the manliest of men (or women). My friend, if it was possible for a dirt bike to sprout chest hair and a five o'clock shadow, this Honda would look like Tom Selleck. It is just that manly.

It was never intended to ride down a grass filled ditch in your LBZ baggy gear looking like a spode. It wasn't meant to do 3-foot long pop wheelies in front of your hillbilly friends in your cousin's back yard while everyone drinks Budweiser. No, that's what a 50 is for. If that's the kind of bike you're looking for, then just do us all a favor and stop reading right now. This bike has been to hell and back, twice, and has the scars to prove it. So if you can't handle being seen behind the bars of this biblical, fire breathing, dragon slaying hero because it has a few purple hearts, move on.

This bike was engineered by 3rd degree ninja pirate super-warriors in the highest mountains of Japan to serve the needs of the man that cheats death on a daily basis. They didn't even consider superfluous Nancy boy, contradictory decor in the form of Monster, Red Bull, Spy, Oakley, FMF, and Pro Circuit stickers plastered all over the bike. This bike looks legit because it is.

This brute comes with the things us testosterone-fueled super action junkies need. It has a 600cc to fly down the trail or to outrun the cops and has a 6-speed transmission so you know grandma won't be taking off with it when you're not looking. It's saved my bacon more than once. It's got special blood/gore resistant grippy seat cover. It even has a first-aid kit in the back. You know what the first aid kit has in it? A pint of whiskey, a stitch-your-own-wound kit and a hunk of leather to bite down on when you're operating on yourself. (NOTE: I cut myself fighting a streetbiker who looked at me funny and used the first aid kit, a replacement kit is available for an additional $100 and comes with Gentleman's Jack.)

My price on this bad boy is an incredibly low $1600 but I'll entertain reasonable offers. And by reasonable, I mean don't walk up and tell me you'll give me $500 for it. That's liable to earn you a Burmese-roundhouse-sphincter-kick with a follow up three fingered eye-jab. Would it hurt? Hell yeah. Let's just say you won't be the prettiest guy at the Coldplay concert anymore.

There's only 25,000 miles on this hellcat from Planet Kickass since purchased in 83'. Trust me, it will outlive you and the offspring that will carry your name. It will live on as a monument to your machismo.

Now, go look in the mirror and tell me what you see. If it's a rugged, no holds barred, super brute he-man macho Chuck Norris stunt double, then reply to this ad. I might be out hang-gliding or BASE jumping or just chilling with my lady, but leave a message and I'll get back to you. And when I do, we'll talk about a price over a nice glass of Schmidt while we listen to Johnny Cash.

Great ad. From CL?

[Don-lo]

Haha. just read Dave's post. Great one

(Dave probably just wrote it for that creative writing class he had to take, not!)

This chopper I found actually looks pretty good compared to the garbage normally seen. I just wonder how much that frame flexes.

http://annarbor.craigslist.org/mcy/2923483981.html

[SVSooke]

Haha. just read Dave's post. Great one

(Dave probably just wrote it for that creative writing class he had to take, not!)

This chopper I found actually looks pretty good compared to the garbage normally seen. I just wonder how much that frame flexes.

http://annarbor.craigslist.org/mcy/2923483981.html

That is........well it is unique for sure.WTF is in front of the engine?First thought was a belt drive supercharger,pods make that a no.

[koolaid_kid]

I have seen an automotive alternator driven that way.

[old_skool]

I see one way to get a larger back tire so many bobber/chopper guys here seem to want, naked drive shaft

[mrbill5491]

It is just his type of style on his bikes...

whats with that fender? Lol!

[davidduarte]

Street Tracker 1978 650e - $3000 (Brooklyn Ct)

Date: 2012-03-23, 1:49AM EDT
Reply to: m27sw-2917397456@sale.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

YZF 600 front brakes
Electronic Ignition
Progressive springs
34mm Mikuni round slides.
TC bros intake manifolds
Swing arm brace
Brass bushings in swing arm
Timken upgrade to triple trees
new chain and sprockets +12t on rear

No speedo
Currently registered
All work done by me!!

Meant to be ridden hard and stop on a dime!

860-779-866three

http://hartford.craigslist.org/mcy/2917397456.html

[davidduarte]

This is in better shape than mine, but mine was running when I bought it, and I paid $400 for it (probably too much). I wouldn't pay more than $400 for it not knowing if it would run or not.

http://hartford.craigslist.org/mcy/2917798760.html

Barn Fresh Honda CB200 - $750 (New Haven)

Date: 2012-03-23, 10:58AM EDT
Reply to: vv7md-2917798760@sale.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

Low milage 1974 Honda CB200
Does not run.
All mechanicals seem to be in very good shape.
Cosmetics could be better. Seat is perfect!
Been in storage for the last 20 years.
Sold with Bill of Sale and keys only.
Make an offer.

[davidduarte]

http://hartford.craigslist.org/mcy/2912506257.html

72 CB 350 Honda Great Bobber or Cafe Racer Project - $2800 (Manchester)

Date: 2012-03-20, 1:53PM EDT
Reply to: p76bz-2912506257@sale.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

1972 Honda CB350. This is a great bike! Motor was rebuilt about 2 1/2 years ago and bored out to a 380. Carbs were rebuilt last summer as well as fluids changed and new in-line filters installed. It is running and in great shape. A few scratches, the kind you expect from a bike built in 1972 all in all paint is in good shape. Tires are good, gas tank is 2 years old (new old stock), new battery was purchased last year. Also have a box of spare parts, extra handle bars luggage rack, oil and other odds and ends. Asking 3200.00 or b/o

[davidduarte]

1400 cc. Beginner friendly?

http://hartford.craigslist.org/mcy/2819944028.html

EXCELLSOR HENDERSON (SUPER-X) - $7000 (HARTFORD AREA)

Date: 2012-02-13, 2:54AM EST
Reply to: ssj3s-2819944028@sale.craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

THIS A VERY RARE AMERICAN V-TWIN. IT IS A 1999 1400CC WITH 8000MI. BEGINNER FRIENDLY.

VISIT www.excelsiorhenderson.com FOR YOUR OWN RESEARCH. SERIOUS INQUIRES ONLY CALL 413-426-6511 ASK FOR DOMINICK .

[Big T]

Best one so far

http://portland.craigslist.org/clk/mcy/2921402074.html

so up for sale

1991 zx7

this is why u dont let friends buy a bike on payments

my friend was buying it and wrecked it for me

so nice of him right

750cc

still starts and runs

tires hold air

needs little love

clean title in hand

just rode it down the street

u can rebuild it or customize it as u wish

$ 800

jeremy 503 753 9958

Is there a single part that isn't damaged? See if you can spot one