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Craigslist "funnies"

  • Thread starter Thread starter BIG_brother
  • Start date Start date
here's my ad for some furniture that I finally sold, but not until after a month or so of multitudes of morons:

REDUCED PRICE sleeper sofa & love seat by Jennifer Convertibles - $100

Date: 2011-02-25, 11:33PM EST
Reply to: sale-xjk8e-2235180938@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

Please, take the time to READ the ad. The COUCH (not the love seat) is
a SLEEPER, that's right, it folds out into a bed. Please don't waste
my time by saying you'll come by, then have me mention the sleeper,
then you say, "oh, I don't want a sleeper." Also, if you roll up my
driveway in a Corolla, and say something about going to get a Uhaul
truck, don't think I'm going to hold the couch for you unless you put
cash in my hand. This stuff isn't brand new, or in like new condition,
but it's in serviceable condition. My wife decided to get a new couch,
but I would have been very happy keeping them. I'm not Bob's Discount
Furniture. This set would be perfect for a room with kids, a house
with pets, and/or for a college student, as they have some stains, and
some damage from a cat. If you come look at it, make me an offer.
Don't call me before 9 in the morning, especially on a weekend. There
are no bedbugs, roaches or other bugs in them.

Off white two-toned queen SLEEPER convertible couch with matching love
seat from a non-smoking environment. Structure and mattress in
excellent condition, upholstery in moderate condition. Will sell
separately. Please email or call 860-XXX-XXXX. PICK UP ONLY.
 
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Unhappy Seller

Unhappy Seller

Can't trust anybody.....

Quote:

"This bike has been sold and the fat little creep that bought it never retured My ramp and Ancra straps I loaned him. So sellers beware of a 400 lb.kid sporting a bandanna claiming to be from Arkansas having his MOMMY drive him around in a Dodge Ram pick-up. He's a Fat-a++ (SCAMMER)"

http://desmoines.craigslist.org/mcy/2329100872.html
 
Complete with anti-gravity option.....

Complete with anti-gravity option.....

Trade 2 atvs for old Jap street bike. - $2 (Kenosha,WI.)

Date: 2011-04-17, 12:06AM CDT
Reply to: see below



I would like to trade my 04 Suzuki LT250z Quadsport, very nice,great running.decent tires. & 04 Yamaha Raptor 80 runs great. Have a great time with the kids. Im looking for a older great running Jap street bike from the 70s to 90s or a couple old Jap mopeds. No junk please. If intrested call Bob at xxxxxx Thanks. The blaster is gone already traded for other bike.

  • Location: Kenosha,WI.
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
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3n53k33l45Q35W25R6b4gc177198316e11105.jpg
 
I love this ad:

1972 CB350 - $400
Date: 2011-03-29, 8:24PM EDT
Reply to: sale-uk8xj-2294245511@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

1972 CB350 K4

Frame, motor, wheels... basically.

It was maroon at one point!

It was brand new in the past.

Sweet wire wheels!

The motor is carved out of a block of .999 SILVER!

The frame is made from Mother of Pearl! Can you believe that?!

Big yellow reflectors so your mom wont be scared to let you ride at night!

Two gauges... count 'em TWO!

The oil in the picture isn't from the bike. He (the bike is a male) always wanted to go to the Saudi Arabia but could never afford it, so I gave him the oil as a gift.

It has a Chuck-Norris-Roundhouse-Kickstand! Boy, thats rad!

Drum brakes from an ancient Indian music group.

The springs in the back once went on a date with Slinky!

The tires are made out of alligator skin and PETA approved. (Pending DOT approval.)

Motor turns.

12,000 miles

I have the title.

Best offer.

3n03o43l55V15Y55S4b3tc4fa6ccedf0f12bf.jpg
 
Translation please? Am I missing a wof on my bike :confused:

WOF - Warrant Of Fitness (required every 6 months once a vehicle is 2 or more years old)

Rego - Registration fee (6 or 12 monthly) and includes the ACC levy (Accident Compensation Corporation) which is sorta like a compulsory cover for accident/disability related medical type insurance. (approx $400 PA per vehicle even for multiple vehicles):(
 
Here's a BS talking idiot seller that the world can definately do without :

http://sandiego.craigslist.org/nsd/mcy/2329747070.html

SO I STILL HAVE THIS BIKE IF ANYONE WANTS TO COME RIDE IT NOW I GOT A CLUTCH LEVER FOR IT AND ITS HERE AT MY HOUSE NOW. IT WAS AT TRACKAHOLICS IN OSIDE AND I BROUGHT IT HOME TODAY BUT MAKE SURE U HAVE BIG BALLS AND BRING A DIAPER CUZ UR GONNA SH$T UR PANTS WEN U RIDE IT. THIS BIKE HAS SOME ISSUES!!! MOSTLY SECOND GEAR IS BAD IT WILL STILL GO IN BUT YOU NEED TO SHIFT TO 3 RIGHT AWAY IF UR NOT GONNA COME SEE IT AND BRING ME SOME CASH DONT WASTE MY TIME PLEASE. I WANT IT GONE ASAP
NOTE!!! I WILL NOT SELL THIS BIKE TO SOMEONE THAT DOESNT KNOW HOW TO RIDE THESE OLDER BIKES PERIOD!!!!!! THIS BIKE WILL KILL YOU FASTER THAN SH$T!!! IVE ALMOST DIED ON IT 3 TIMES ITS VERY FAST AND DOESN'T STOP THAT FAST IM NOT JOKING EITHER THIS BIKE IS NOT FOR A BEGINNER IF UR LOOKING FOR AN EVERYDAY TROUBLE FREE DRIVER THIS ONE IS NOT IT BUT IT COULD BE WITH SOME WORK AND PATIENTS... ITS A PERFECT PROJECT BIKE IT HAS 38MM MIKUNI FLATSIDE RACE CARBS AND A SHORTY HEADER SUPER LOUD!!!! ATTRACTS ALOT OF ATTENTION mike 760 685 5995



Quote: NOTE!!! I WILL NOT SELL THIS BIKE TO SOMEONE THAT DOESNT KNOW HOW TO RIDE THESE OLDER BIKES PERIOD!!!!!! Yea, ok if some idiot threw $1500 cash in your face, you would be faster on that than a hobo on a ham sandwich !


Quote : "MAKE SURE U HAVE BIG BALLS AND BRING A DIAPER CUZ UR GONNA SH$T UR PANTS WEN U RIDE IT." Meaning from excessive power or the fact the chassis is a clapped out POS ?

Quote : " IVE ALMOST DIED ON IT 3 TIMES ITS VERY FAST AND DOESN'T STOP " I'm simply speechless. This guy is my new posterboy for the MSF !
 
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