When testing the voltage on the stator, you put your test leads on two of the stator legs at a time. Do not put one lead on ground, there is no "ground" between the stator and R/R.
You don't have to remove the engine cover to test the stator, just disconnect the wires between the R/R and the stator and test those.
You said you read the Stator Papers, but I recommend going back and reading the Primer again so that you're sure you understand how this system actually works: http://www.thegsresources.com/garage/gs_statorfacts.htm
It would help your mechanical abilities quite a lot to understand basic electrical concepts. Particularly the difference between voltage and current, AC vs DC, how to read a schematic, how to build simple circuits, and so on. Since you clearly have access to the Internet, there's absolutely no excuse for being "completely dumb when it comes to electrical." The information is out there, you just have to find it and put forth the effort to learn it!
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